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The Vicious Cycle of a Lonely Life

When I was a university student, the circle of my friends was daunting. I have so many friends it was scary. Christmas was probably one of the most dreaded seasons for me as I’d be dead broke buying gifts and cards for everyone who was close to me (and that’s still a LOT of people). However, somehow, somewhere, that began to change when I turned into a full fledged working adult. That circle shrank. Tremendously.

Recently, Pastor Tim has been preaching on a series of sermons entitled “Connected” and it was a good slap on the face for many of us. “If you’re always busy and have no time for people, then you’re just replacing relationships with self-centered priorities,” he said. So is the culture that we’re living in today, where everyone is busy and ever busy with being busy, busily busying their busy lives away (phew). And when I think about it, most of the time, my busyness has NOTHING to do with relating to people. And that’s a very sad fact because people should matter more than matter.

I wonder what happened? What went wrong?

You see, we start off by being individualistic. We tell ourselves, “I am all that matters. I am the truth. This life is about pleasing myself, doing what I like to do, going where I want to do…” and the self-absorbed notions go on and on. Puffed up with pride, thinking we’re all-capable, we move on to an independent state of mind, thinking “I don’t need anyone else and I don’t want to involve others in my life. Why should I, since I am self-sufficient?” When this mentality continues to spread like a cancer in our souls, we isolate ourselves from our communities of friends. We prefer to do things alone, without the need nor urgency to involve others in our daily lives and activities. Pretty soon, with others out of our lives, we become indifferent and careless about people altogether. News about innocent people killed, young girls getting raped and other inhumane happenings do not bother us anymore. Our hearts are hardened like stone, without a heartbeat for compassion or love. And this vicious cycle completes itself in idolatry, placing ourselves as supreme and utmost important. And God? Who needs God when one’s idol reflects his own deceitfully beautiful but wretched image?

That probably explains the loneliness epidemic in the world today. We’ve got all that can keep us connected with one another. Facebook, Twitter, Skype and mobile phones, you name it. But people are still lonely. Still individualistic. Still independent. Still isolated. Still indifferent. Still idolizing.

Have we forgotten how to take time and enjoy another’s friendship and company? Have we forgotten how to laugh together, cry together, accomplish and build together, believe together and just to be… together?

Take time today. Ask your soul (and I’ll ask mine), “When will we finally choose to break out of this vicious cycle and live a life of togetherness again?” A life full of people who care, love and believe in one another. A life that matters to others. A life that counts.

3 replies
  1. Alice
    Alice says:

    Are you and Chrystin free next weekend? (23rd n34th) We have a trip to Cameron Highland for showing movies and playing with Orang Asli children there. :) You can laugh, cry, accomplish and build together. :)

    • Aaroink
      Aaroink says:

      Haha, it’s ironic that I should tell you we’re actually full that weekend because we’re having combined service at church and we’re hosting some people from Penang =) Sorry lah

      • Alice
        Alice says:

        =))) then we have different party to attend and enjoy already. :D Have a great time this weekend then. ^^

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